Now that I’ve been engaged for two months, I feel like I’ve earned my Steve Harvey credentials to give advice on how to get upgraded from girlfriend to fiancee. So if you want to know my tried and true method for getting your boyfriend to propose, continue reading!
Look better and better every time you see him
Most women – and men – make the mistake of showing up their very best on the first date. This is HUGE mistake! If you’re on complete fleek on date 1, then every day after that will be a letdown. You have to begin at a basic level of cuteness (or even a cute hot mess), and then continue to get more and more fly as time progresses in your relationship. Once you get to a level of maximum greatness, your boyfriend will be in such shock, he’ll be scared that someone else will come and scoop you and your beauty away that he’ll lock it down.
Bae knew me when I was wearing purple Apple Bottom Converse knock-offs, grey colored contacts, and a wet and wavy weave that I’m pretty sure had tracks showing. Now every time he sees me he’s like DANG, because he knows that I get better like a bottle of wine.
Bring him around your family on a holiday, preferably Thanksgiving
There are very few things that make men happier, heck make anyone happier than food and fellowship. Bring your boo over to your folks place for Thanksgiving, have him stuff his face with all types of yummy things – one of which you HAVE to cook so you can be part of his joy – sink into the couch to watch football, and just be happy. Since Thanksgiving marks the start of the holiday season, there are bound to be at least 3 commercials every hour for jewelry, especially engagement rings. Since men are often clueless, these kinds of subtle reminders are much more useful in getting him to think about engagement, then say, you talking about engagement. The key is to have him content and well fed, watching something he wants to watch, and letting the TV do all the hard work!
I invited Bae to spend Thanksgiving with my family last year, and during a commercial for Zales or Kay or one of those places, he casually asked me if I liked the ring in the commercial. Now ya girl was TOO ready because I’d already had a secret wedding Pinterest board, but I calmly (and stealthily, out of my parent’s earshot) let him know that I found that one ok, but it wasn’t my favorite. This opened up the door for a conversation about which was my favorite, which led me to getting the exact ring of my dreams!
Godly relationship advice will tell you to start praying for your husband even while you’re single, and also pray that God prepares and molds you into the wife He wants you to be. While I agree this can be a beneficial exercise, lots of people forget to pray while you’re in a relationship. Praying together not only strengthens both of your walks toward Christ, but it can help solidify that you each have the other person in your future plans.
We started seriously praying about guidance and favor in our relationship at the beginning of this year, both together and apart. One prayer that is still my favorite is that we pray that our relationship bring honor to God by being a testament to others of His love and grace. By keeping Jesus at the center of our relationship, we were able to draw closer to one another. We also reached a point where we began to seek out Christian marital advice, and read a pre-marital book together that helped sharpen our conversations around marriage.
Plan a romantic getaway
Depending on if you’re the type of girl who is obsessed with surprises or not, then this may not apply, but for some people, it’s great to create opportunities that make engagement possible. Whether this is romantic getaways, big birthday parties with all your friends and family in tow, or long walks on the beach, some guys get overwhelmed with the idea of planning and become paralyzed with all the options. Also, just because opportunities are created doesn’t mean the surprise element is totally voided.
When we booked our trip to Dubai and Italy in March, we didn’t have engagement explicitly in our thoughts – I was just trying to go on Baecay! By the time September rolled around, I had a good idea that it may happen, but I also had some doubts because I couldn’t imagine when Bae could have bought the ring. Lucky for me, Italy was a romantic enough setting for him, and became the setting for our engagement.
Wear a low cut dress that makes your booty pop
Hunty when all else fails, just look like a superstar any time you guys go to dinner (well as long as you’re not going to Chick Fil-A). This circles back to number 1 – look so scrumptious that your boyfriend will have no choice but to lock it down.
I found the dress I ended up getting engaged in while hanging out with my best friend in Houston. I wasn’t even trying to dress shop, but she was taking a while to find a dress she liked so I did what all homegirls do when we tag along – I started trying on dresses too! As soon as I put this one on, I squealed and she said girl that’s IT! When I put it on before Bae and I went to dinner, his eyes widened and I knew it was a success.
Do NOT give your boyfriend food he’s allergic to
Unless you’re me, you probably won’t be this lucky. I ended up accidentally giving Bae lobster while we were at dinner the night he proposed, because my food was so delicious and I’m generous enough to share. I interpreted risotto with scampi as shrimp scampi in risotto, which would have been cool because Bae can eat shrimp, but not crab and lobster. We’ve cut 3 dates short over the years because he’s consumed crab or lobster, and the man breaks out in terrible hives and has an itchy throat that’s calmed only slightly with Benadryl. Turns out that scampi in Italian is actually lobster, and as soon as we found this out, his throat started being uncomfortable. As he went to the bathroom to cough it up/gather himself, I prayed harder than ever before and somehow, he emerged fairly unscathed. Best part is that this gave him a good 10 minutes away from the table with good reason, during which time he managed to coordinate with the wait staff to set up a private area where he ended up popping the question. Which leads me to ask… was he ever really allergic to lobster?? *side eye*
Note: I don’t suggest intentionally giving your boyfriend food he’s allergic to. I think my luck was simply on fleek that night!